~2013~

    
      This is a new year, and it's time for change. I know the doubts you just had flash before your eyes, 1% of New Year's resolutions actually succeed right? That's ok. I can't say I don't have the same thoughts. This time I am armed with plans.
       For my fitness goal I've enrolled in two physical education courses at school. I am very serious about my GPA and so I will not allow some gym classes to mess that up. That said I will have no choice but to participate and put in great effort. So to start, my fitness goal is to participate in each class during the week.
       I have also started a group that has registered to do the Color Run 5K race in April. My goal is to complete the race. I don't have a time to beat, I don't require myself to sprint the entire thing.My goal is to jog at least part of it and finish the race. I've got some great friends that have joined me and I can't let them down! If you'd like info on joining our group called *Full Spectrum* just ask!
       For my nutrition goals- I'm starting really simple. Probably too simple for the average person versed in weight loss goal advice. I will vow to drink one bottle of water a day. That's all for now. I know that many other changes need to follow, and that isn't enough water for the day; I get that. But, like a friend pointed out, the more things I say I'm going to change in 5 minutes, the greater the chance of failure.
      For my intellectual goal, I am striving to do well in my classes and keep my GPA no lower than a 3.75. I really want to participate in the honors program, and several teachers have recommended I seek membership. I also plan to build a little review time in each week to make midterms and finals easier.
      For my family goal, I am going to work hard to get and remain more organized. Chaos at 7:00 am is driving us all crazy. Where's my socks? What happened to my library book? I forgot to put my ice packs in the freezer last night... sound like your house? That's how it sounds here. I'm going to look for some little bins and storage containers to give everything a "home". Surely this will take some time to master but that's fine by me.
      For my relationship goal, I'm going follow the phrase "the grass is greener where you water it". Marriage takes work and it's easy to let it fall into the hustle and bustle of everyday life. According to Grandma Green, divorce isn't an option- so we better work hard. =) love that lady.
      Maybe the resolution bug has bitten me, maybe I won't perfect each of these goals in a week, month, or even 6 months. Maybe I succeed with two changes this entire year.
      Here's what I don't need- debbie downers. I know the odds. I know I've said this before. I know that habits almost 27 years in the making don't break easily. I need hands to pull me back up when I fall. I need a friend to call and ask how I'm doing. I need someone to invite me out for a walk at a park nearby. People succeed when they have support of those around them. I'm getting closer to 30 every day. My kids are getting closer to becoming adults every day. I want the ability to participate fully in their lives for a long long time. So I'm going to try, try, try again.
2013- Bring it on!
~k~

She's just a girl, and she's on FIRE!

She's just a girl and she's on fire
Hotter than a fantasy, lonely like a highway
She's living in a world and it's on fire
Feeling the catastrophe, but she knows she can fly away

Ohhhh oh oh oh oh
She got both feet on the ground
And she's burning it down
Ohhhh oh oh oh oh
She got her head in the clouds
And she's not backing down

THIS GIRL IS ON FIRE!!!

Sing it Alicia! I feel like my life is on fire right now! In a good way of course! 10 years ago I dropped out of high school as a teen mom. With a 9th grade education and a GED, I just finished my first college semester with a 4.0 GPA! I'm ecstatic! I couldn't be more proud of myself right now. I'm sure it will be a challenge to maintain this, but it's a challenge I'm up for! At the recommendation of one of my professors, I am striving for the Honors Program, 3.75 GPA required.

If you are thinking to yourself "show off" or "quit bragging", you obviously don't know me very well. I have always lacked confidence and self pride. Some of the feedback I was given this semester from my professors have been the fuel for my total self image turn around. Here's what they had to say:

After my presentation for my research project in human geography: "If any of you are still working on your project to present next week, you should look at Kimberly's as a model. Hers is perfection. Very well done."

(same professor, email):  "I enjoyed having you in class this semester.  You are a honest person and a very serious student.  Your final exam is a little lower than the mid-term, but not very much.  Consequently, your final grade is accordingly, i.e., a deserved "A."  Congratulations!"

From the English professor, for my final essay: "This is a very strong essay.  There is much to commend it: the research is sound, the prose is varied and mature, and the ideas sophisticated.  The subject, a vexing, difficult and emotive one, is treated with care and skill too.  You will do very well here, without doubt.  My advice is to align yourself with those who work as hard as you do.  Good luck and keep in touch."  ( I will admit I had to look up the word "prose" hehe.)

The English professor is the one that went on to recommend the honors program...

I would say I am doing alright! Things are getting even more exciting in January. Rob has decided to go back to school again! He will be taking pre-req courses so he can start nursing school the following year! He just got a great new job at an awesome hospital with so many benefits! 

I'm also taking not one, but TWO physical education classes this coming semester. Body Sculpting & Core on Monday, Walking Fit for Life on Wednesday and an exercise period on Fridays since I will be there anyway. Plus I'm going to start the couch to 5k program to prepare for The Color Run in April!

Being home by 5:30 will enable me to be home to cook dinners, our main issue with eating is convenience. $5 pizza down the street with no dishes or cooking... We've got to end that trend. 

Changing my life one semester at a time. That's my mantra right now. 

~Til next time~
~K~     

  

5k what? RUN?? When?? YIKES!!

So I'm feeling a bit froggy.... I have signed the hubbs and I up for a 5k run in April 2013. No sweat right? Plenty of time to train... yeah ok. The last time I ran I was probably 8 years old! CRAP!

Most of you know that I've been attempting to lose weight for years. I say attempting lightly, because I tend to fall off of the wagon pretty fast. What can I say, it's a bumpy ride, and I don't have shock absorbers! What's my plan you might ask? 

Well I think I'm setting up a fool proof QUIT PROOF plan! I signed up for a lot of stuff lately, the 5k run, a cardio/walking class for spring semester, and a body sculpting class for school too! The classes will start January 7th. My thinking here is this: these two classes will force me to exercise. I plan to keep a high GPA, and I can't let a little P.E. class mess that up. I will be required to come to gym class and exercise twice a week to obtain a good grade. I put it in the middle of my school day so I'm not tempted just to skip it and go home. PLUS~ I built in time Friday mid day to workout in the gym at the school solo too.

So with couch to 5k training for the next few months, plus these classes 3 days a week for 5 months, I'm hoping that I'll see some amount of weight loss, and be in the habit of working out 3 times a week~ thus creating a habit!! 

On a serious note, the Doc has given me some orders. Now that she's got my thyroid pretty much under control she's advocating a gradual change to healthier behaviors. Time to change!!

~Til next time~
~K~

Alright y'all it's that time again, time for cool brisk days, cuddle up in a blanket nights... the holiday season is upon us! Now those of you that know me well know that I blend the two together, it's November 8th and I'm behind on decorating, but when I get to it I break out the "Christmas" decor right away! Many of you are against this, I get it. I still have "two holidays" but I love the look of all the holiday lights and such. Um plus I don't have fall/Thanksgiving decorations. If I did, I would surely put those out until Turkey Day and then do "Christmas decor". So if you come over and see my snowmen and garland, that's just me... :-P 

This year is going to go a little different for me, my Nana has come to a point where she just can't handle the large holiday meal anymore. She will make herself do it, but then she's wiped out for days... and who wants Nana going through all that? So it's time to let Nana retire. Exciting part? I am cooking for my mom's family!

I must say I'm thrilled to have creative reign over the menu (with input from the family as well). Plus, last year I did a trial run of Nana's dressing, and it came out very close to hers, (and got the Nana seal of approval in a taste test!!) So I will be happy to share this with my family.I can't wait to teach the kids one day all of the yummy recipes I've learned- and will learn. There is something special about a home cooked meal that brings everyone together!

I recently received turkey salt and pepper shakers from my aunt Jess, so I'm thrilled to be putting those out for use!

What's on the menu you ask? Well, turkey, dressing, gravy, mashed potatoes, macaroni and cheese, lima beans, green beans, fresh cream corn, rolls, broccoli and rice casserole, sweet potato souffle, chicken and dumplings, sausage balls, deviled eggs, spinich dip, pumpkin cupcakes, pumpkin pie, chocolate cake, pecan pie, chocolate pie, cherry cheesecake and cranberry sauce! YUMMY!

After the meal at our house, we will be headed to Rob's family get together where the newest official wife in the Green Family is preparing dinner! While I'm talking about them, let me just add that I'm thankful for having two sisters (in law) that are fabulous! These three brothers got themselves some great women... ;)

Then for what I hope becomes a new tradition, Nina (my mom) is going to come stay with the kids for Rob and I to go out Black Friday shopping, and the next morning make holiday crafts, cocoa and muffins with the kids! 

I'm so excited this time of year, everything is beautiful, the lights and warm feelings make it seem so magical.

So, let's get interactive! What is the one thing (or a couple) that you MUST have for your Thanksgiving meal to be complete? That one thing you could say "it ain't Thanksgiving" without it? Leave your answer in a comment below! 

Til next time~
~K

 

Cosby was right, kids say (and do) the darndest things!

It's been quite awhile since I've posted anything, so what better way to make a come back than to start with the pleasantries of being the parent of a toddler. Alexis is getting to be quite a character! What's she up to? well, Dr. Seuss for one. She is obsessed with the movie Horton Hears A Who, it doesn't matter if she is actually sitting to watch it, she still wants it playing pretty much 24/7 with a couple of breaks for Micky Mouse Clubhouse! 

Check her out here, listen close and you will hear her say "Horton Hears a Who!" I had to put the link instead of the youtube video, the video when added won't show up. Not sure why, if anyone knows let me know~

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpFlHbzaVyA


Last weekend we traveled to see our dear friends, and Lexi decided to learn the concept of sharing... or so she thought...

The ladies are all sitting on the porch, while Lexi toddles around going in and out the door. She's carrying a bag of candy corn around eating one here and there. She goes inside, and after a couple of minutes Zander comes out with an announcement: "Um the baby looks weird." 
Me: "He's fine, he's just sitting funny because of the Bumbo seat." 
Zander: "no mom, I mean he looks like.... his face looks like he doesn't feel good..." 
Me: "ok I'll check on him"
I head inside to see what little Wylie is up to, and he looks fine. I pick him up and initiate the usual "baby babble" and I notice that he doesn't smile at me like usual. Something told me to check his mouth- low and behold I fish out a whole candy corn! He just stares at me having no idea what is happening since he isn't really eating more than bottles yet... I tell Lexi that she can't feed the baby candy, and she replies "I share." 

How do you argue with that? We teach our children from the start that you "share" "be nice" etc. At least her efforts were out of love.

Luckily the little guy didn't try to eat the candy, it just sat on his tongue. Equally lucky, Zander noticed something wasn't quite right even if he was not sure what it was. But let's keep this post a positive one instead of a "what could have happened". Lexi went on to "share" the rest of the candy corn with the doggy... hehe. (Cookie is also fine!) 

What other fun things can we chronicle about Alexis and the fine age of 20 months old? Hmmmm. She's recently become a fan of "daps" or "fist bumps"... and will ~almost~ always give them if you ask! 

She loves Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, and can name almost all of the characters... my favorite one she says is Goofy, but when she says it, it comes out as "goosey". Precious with a capital "p"!

She loves shoes, Daddy, and all of her stuffed animal friends. Christmas is lookin' like a Minnie Makeover for her! Adding in some Dr. Seuss and some Disney Princess here and there. 

That's all I've got for now on the Lexi front, stay tuned for Jaden and Zander updates as well as other things to come!

Til next time
~K~

A rainbow underneath gray cloudy skies, casting light on a serene landscape. I have to say this is a good depiction of my life right now. Most of you know that I'm the type of person that has to get things out. I need to talk out my issues for me to figure out how to deal with them. Generally that involves anyone that will listen. Each person I tell lessens the stress and worry a little bit more. Some people frown upon sharing "your business" with other people. I'm the opposite. I feel like if I want to truly let people in my life, I should let them all the way in, thus forming stronger bonds. Grab a coffee or tea folks, this one is going to take awhile.

    I don't think I have ever encountered this crazy of a roller coaster of emotions in my 26 years on this Earth. The number of things on my mind at the present moment are turning me into a basket case, full of happiness, worry, stress, excitement, fear, uncertainty, sadness, longing, reflection, and a change in perspective. This wonderful soul of mine is deciding on her own that self discovery is going to be mandatory and it is going to happen now whether I like it or not. I have a nice little voice in my mind that is navigating my thoughts, telling me what it's time to work on now. (Don't worry folks it's not schizophrenia... hehe)
     I'm being faced with a potential MAJOR medical issue. I've had some problems ever since I had Lexi, I just never did get back to feeling "right". I've of course pushed it aside, thinking it would eventually work itself out... and much to my disappointment it's getting worse instead. To make a very long list short I've had a multitude of symptoms, the worst of the lot are blinding headaches that I've had CONSTANTLY for the last 2 weeks, I started noticing more frequent headaches in July, but they've just gotten stronger and stronger and don't go away even briefly. Add to that constant severe fatigue and you've got one crappy day lol. I've had a thyroid test (came back normal), and now I'm waiting on a CT scan of my brain. Um let me just tell you in case you didn't know, "we want to check your brain for any mass or fluid causing pressure" is not something that you are going to remain calm about. I thought for sure the eye doctor was being dramatic, but to my surprise after meeting with my primary care dr, he seconded this, and gave me the referral. Brain scan?? WHAT?? Sure sure, it's a precaution, to rule out big issues. BUT, the fact that it's on the table as a possible diagnosis is life shattering. I'm holding my composure rather well I think, I understand tumors and such are very rare. BUT there has to be someone that gets them otherwise we wouldn't be talking about them right? While everyone else is having a blast with their three day weekend I will be biting my nails (metaphorically thank goodness lol) waiting for Tuesday morning's CT scan. 
      Just for kicks and to emphasize my inner emotional roller coaster, lets talk about a "rainbow" issue happening to me now. I went in today to present my speech entry to try and obtain a spot as the student speaker at the GED commencement ceremony. I was one of the three they narrowed it down to. I was very nervous when I got there, and was talking to the staff. All of a sudden the director of the GED program at Gwinnett Tech tells me that she forgot to tell me but I'm the class Valedictorian!! SAY WHAT??? I think my actual response was "that's cool" haha I was surprised. She said "Yeah, you scored higher than anyone else that took the test in the 2011-2012 test year." Me?? She then goes on to tell me that I get a special medal and extra tassel, and will be listed as the valedictorian. Um coolest thing EVER! That just made this accomplishment so much more special to me. I've spent my life doubting myself and my self worth. Today I was validated as "special" (ya'll hush, no special ed jokes). All my life I've wanted to prove to myself that I AM SOMEBODY, that I'm actually worth more than failure. I rocked the speech presentation and q & a, and got a callback within an hour with an invitation to give my speech as Valedictorian. (can ya'll tell I like this title...? hehehe) I left the office beaming with more pride than I've ever felt in my life. I'd finally proven to myself what so many others had been telling me. I deserve this. I truly believe this now.
      Roller coaster dip #2- annnnnnd back down I go.... Jaden went to the doctor last week, and while we were talking about her cramp issue (for those who don't know she's been having what I assumed was a menstrual type cramp situation monthly for the last year and a half, but hasn't started her cycle). Her doctor asked about the development of breast tissue, and when I said that just started a month or two ago (jeez right? when did she get this old??) he got concerned. They shouldn't start signs of menstruation until AFTER the start of breast tissue, like 6 months to 2 years after, under NO circumstance should it start a year and a half BEFORE. In the last few months it's gotten to the point I'm giving her Midol, and she needs a heating pad. He got even more concerned so now she has to see a gynecologist. Um luckily for you ladies out that that just winced, they won't do an internal exam, they will use labs and ultrasound and such, but yikes. She should be worried about Justin Bieber and riding her bike, and writing song lyrics about loving her daddy. Not womanly issues that she isn't old enough to understand. Are you starting to see why I'm ready to leave the theme park for awhile??
     Ready for another uphill climb? School is going pretty well for me. I'm starting to find my groove in my classes. I've never knew 4-5 years could be such an age difference, but I guess it's my life situation. I've become the "lady" that knows all about what the homework was, and has a pen you can borrow. Lol I guess this is better than my original fear of not being able to make friends. And you know, I think I wouldn't know what to do if it went any other way. I've spent my entire life being the mother hen. I feel a maternal bond to my four younger siblings, I have 3 kids of my own, and I just find myself drawn to helping kids in any way I can. This is how I know my major is the right choice for me. Nothing gives me more joy than being a mom, and sharing my love of coloring, reading, crafts, oh and just my love. I knew when I was little that I wanted to be a teacher, and I've never faltered from that desire. Sure I've entertained other ideas, but in the end I knew this would be the career for me. I'm not sure I'm doing everything right in my English class, our professor is a bit vague, but hopefully my first essay is within the gist of what I was supposed to do. My human geography professor is a challenge because of her extremely thick Romanian accent, but I find each lecture makes it a hair easier to know what she's saying. Math 99 is fine, I'm almost ready to retake my compass, and if I pass it this time I can stop going to class for the rest of this semester for math. History.... ah history. It's my least favorite. I definitely won't be taking any electives there lol. As a whole, school is an enjoyable experience. 
     Add to these trying to see if a friendship is repairable, adjusting to life with full time school and full time household, the stress of everything, the unknown on my medical issues- and the fact that by 10 am I'm ready to go back to bed, everything is just taking a toll on me a little bit. But every day I just try to stand a little bit taller... (at 5'0" that's hard to do!)

I'll leave you today with two of my "songs of the moment" The Best is Yet to Come by Hinder, and The Good Life by One Republic. I think my next tattoo will center around the lyric "the best is yet to come" but that is another post for another day
~Til next time~ ~K

Day 1~ College Experience

"You've shown up to a writing class, and you haven't got a pen or paper? Oh dear we are off to a nice start aren't we?" (spoken in a British accent) 

      Of course this wasn't directed at me... I came prepared with enough supplies for half the class hehe. I knew going into this that there would be mass amounts of "kids" aged 18+, but I've never felt so much older than those kids as I did yesterday. 

      I was prepared with all of the necessary books and supplies, minus the two I have on order waiting for them to come in at the campus bookstore. What I couldn't believe was the fact that I was in the EXTREME minority by being prepared. People showed up without a pen or paper. Really folks?? I was asked probably 10 times what "bookstore" I was talking about. Students seemed shocked to find out there was one on campus. Many people in my math class didn't have their sign in information for the computer, the instructor just stood there dumbfounded. I think someone forgot to tell these guys that their moms wouldn't be with them. Hey guys, you might actually have to do some stuff while you are in the school. Needless to say I'm feeling very "mother hen" right now. But you know, isn't that a good thing? After all being a mom is what I know. That kind of sounds weird, but I just mean that helping people, and teaching others just might be the choice I was suppose to make all along. I think it points to a passion that is going to develop over the next 4 years, and one that will make for a great career of fulfillment. 

       I have wanted to be a teacher as far back as I can remember. I entertained a small handful of other ideas that I'd really rather learn more about for personal enrichment- for example: hair coloring, wedding planning, baking... those are things that interest me, but that I don't think I'd like to do on a daily basis. Hobbies that would be fun as a side job here and there, but the truth is I really just want to enhance the lives and education of little kids. I can't wait to tell them the first day of school that my name is Mrs. Green- just like the color... and hear them giggle because it's silly. I can't yet imagine the payoff I'll be getting the moment I see the "light bulb" click on in little Suzy's eyes as she finally gets a new concept. I want to make a difference out there in the world. 

    I have a lot to learn. How do you use a semicolon properly? When are you suppose to use whom instead of who.... How exactly do you teach a child to read? When was the War of 1812? (Just kidding... hehe even I can figure out that one...) but you get the idea. 

        We were asked in English to take out a piece of paper and write about why we are "here". The only thing you couldn't say was "to get a job/make money/get an education"- because of course you are here for that. After writing we got in groups of four to read ours aloud to the group. After we all read we were to select one that would be read to the entire class. Our group chose mine almost immediately after reading them all. I was surprised. Here are these three girls- none of which are a day over 20, and they all instantly think what I had to say was the best. (I like all of theirs, and didn't even get in on the vote). The deal was whoever got picked didn't have to read their own. So since they picked mine one of the other girls had to opt to read it aloud. Group one goes- the guy reads probably 2 sentences. Basically "I'm here because its what I'm doing", group 2 goes and it's just a tad longer, basically he elaborates on education. My turn. I feel instantly weird because I'm the only one with kids and I wrote personal info not knowing we were reading aloud.  The girl starts reading mine and to sum it up I said that I'm here to accomplish something I can be proud of. That my family is filled with high school dropouts. That I am a mother of three children and I want to teach them that you can do anything you set your mind to no matter what choices you've made. That I've never felt capable or deserving of doing this. But that I was going to to end the cycle of dropouts, and to be proud of me. 

      The room was silent. When the girl stops reading the instructor (in his super cool British accent, making it sound way cooler and more important) says "wow, you've got three kids, and you're gonna give this a go? Wow, that's really commendable, that's inspiring there. How old are your kids?" I answer, "10,7 and 18 months." "18 months?? so you've got to go home, do your homework, help two kids with their homework and take care of a baby?" he says. I say "yes, it's going to be hard..." so he tells me "you stick with this. That's great, three kids. See folks you can all do this." Self doubt is getting harder to have with all of you fantastic people here to lift me up.

       English was the end of the day (thank God for his accent that spices things up a bit, because usually I find English and History to be the most boring... I know I know. terrible.) The rest of the day was ok. Math 99 is to my delight basically independent study, we did an assessment and so I'm only working on what I don't know, instead of relearning everything. History was... well... history. My bigger concern is Human Geography. My instructor is from Romania. Like- only been here 8 years or so... her accent is so thick I'm not sure I'll understand a darn word. That concerns me, she posts power points for us to print of her lectures, so I'm hoping that I can read along, or that over time I become accustomed to the accent and just learn how to interpret it. Oh and it's basically another "history" class... or falls in the same type of category. Blah lol. Who knows, maybe now that I'm older and actually care it will become more interesting. After all my priorities have changed. Getting a note passed to someone, or seeing a cute guy after class is no longer my number one school day "To-Do"s. 

    So there you have it folks, day 1. 

~Til next time ~K