Mommy of 3 Time for Me!

2012 is really starting to be the year of me. Somehow, maybe even subconsciously, I have become very aware of my life and the directions I am heading in. Call it the recognition of another year passed with my recent birthday if you like. I've been watching those around me the past few months (some for years) continue on paths that either improve their well-being, or completely crush it. I sit here with "social media envy" with a serious "grass is greener on the other side" mentality. But is it really?

I may not be a size 4, be on an island cruise, traveling to a foreign land, driving a flashy new car or anything like that. I've been looking at this the wrong way. I sit here day to day as life passes by and do nothing to change it. I don't know what I'm so afraid of. Hard work? Failure? The time it takes? Sure these are some valid fears. But I think the most important one is that I'm afraid to fail. 

I have come across a couple of quotes lately that really struck a chord with me- "You'll never leave where you are until you decide where you'll rather be.." and "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." (-Mark Twain may have said this according to some sources)

I'm working on my weight loss journey and it's going alright. I'm not dropping serious numbers but I'm getting up and getting out there and starting to actually look forward to the workouts. I haven't missed one workout in the last week. That is a big deal for me. I'm tired of starting over. Time to finish this! Don't get me wrong it will be awhile before I'm at my goal, but each day is taking me one step closer!

The newest excitement in my life is education. I dropped out of high school in 10th grade when I got pregnant with Jaden, and I just never did anything else. I guess I always told myself "it's too late for me now". I have said it before that I was going to enroll in college but never did. Something always held me back- probably myself to be honest. I have had several confidence boosting impromptu therapy sessions with a special friend in my life, and she has drilled it into the core of my being that I can and NEED to do this for myself, my family, my kids... 

I want to teach my kids and myself that things happen, people make bad choices, but you can pretty much always overcome them. I can't let things that happened in my life 10 years ago hold me back from a lifetime of self fulfillment and happiness. My GED test is happening asap and then hopefully I will have the certificate back so I can enroll for college in the fall this year. I'm going for Early Childhood Education (grades k-5). I have asked questions to a couple of people including Jaden's teacher for instance, and I know this is what I want to do. It will take time and a great deal of effort. But what am I doing now besides watching minute after minute of my life pass by. NO regrets!!

For my new inspiration this is my motto on life... Keep your head up!